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I Surrender

RenoDad
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OK, So I had to give in and get more help. I am an Adjunct Professor at a number of schools doing over full time work. I take care of the kids 3 days a week and really most of the time when the family is together. I was trying to start Weight Watchers and other things.

Over the last few days it has really all become too much. I am way behind on my grading. I am starting to yell at the kids way too soon. I called my son stupid two days ago which to me is an offense worse than hitting and my wife and I blew up at each other over those little offenses that you just let go because they are not worth an argument. The Weight Watchers is on hold because I just cannot do it when I am this stressed out.

So today I called Grandma in for assistance so I can catch up on my grading and signed the kids up for an additional day of Day Care. A part of me feels I am failing my kids, but in all truth, I think they are getting better care right now from the excellent day care they are at then they are from me when I am this stressed out. Hopefully this will help things turn around.

Thanks for letting me vent.

Greg

‹ The Mozart Effect Restless Nights ›

Submitted by RenoDad on Fri, 04/04/2008 - 2:44pm.

matt.redsquirrel
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Smart Move

Dude, you gotta take care of yourself before you can take care of someone else. Very good for to set aside any pride and call in reinforcements.

North Carolina Dad's Group
http://lindsaybeans.blogspot.com
http://oneredsquirrelinstatesville.blogspot.com


Fri, 04/04/2008 - 2:47pm

Bellyman_7
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Posts: 75
 Joined: 2008-03-20
 Dad Points: 140
Great Dad

Your a great dad for realizing, addressing, and finding the best possible solution to the issue. It's all about whats best for the children.
Hang in there. No harm no foul.

That which does not kill you, only makes you stronger...
Failure is not an option!


Fri, 04/04/2008 - 4:04pm

AtHomeDaddy
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Posts: 42
 Joined: 2006-11-06
 Dad Points: 57
Smart move. Most of us have

Smart move. Most of us have been at that point where it is more than too much to handle. Or unfortunately, will be there at some point, too.

Mike S
Austin TX


Fri, 04/04/2008 - 4:05pm

BackpackingDad
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 Dad Points: 253
You're an inspiration

Everyone needs a break sometimes.

http://backpackingdad.blogspot.com


Fri, 04/04/2008 - 4:14pm

jimpmc
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Posts: 93
 Joined: 2008-02-26
 Dad Points: 138
I work from home

and when I am having a day where I cannot watch or have fun with my son like I should or if I am having a bad day I call in the assistance. It is not a bad thing. We are all trying to do what is best for our kids...in the moment. We could turn them over to day care full time, but we choose to be a huge part of their lives as apposed to a small part from 6:00pm to 7:30 pm or so. I wouldn't get down on yourself for asking for help. We all ask for help and that is what this site is partly for. Be good and enjoy. What do you teach?


Fri, 04/04/2008 - 5:34pm

Itux
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 Joined: 2007-09-17
 Dad Points: 164
Don't surrender

You took the right decision.

======================
Congratatio pro erudio et auxilium
Itux


Fri, 04/04/2008 - 5:48pm

JPhillip
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 Joined: 2006-11-17
 Dad Points: 917
You made the right call.

This is a great example of what happens to dads who think they can be an AHD and still work steadily part-time. It's just too damn hard. It's not your fault at all. And, you did the right thing. You are a great dad for making a tough call for the well-being of your kids.

To all guys out there thinking about becoming an AHD, remember this post as you make your plans. 1. You can't do it all. 2. Make the tough call when you have to.


Fri, 04/04/2008 - 7:13pm

RenoDad
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Posts: 114
 Joined: 2007-10-25
 Dad Points: 153
Thanks for all of the support

jimmc, I teach Computer science, mostly online.

J Philip is right about how much more difficult it is then you think. My job is about as flexible as it gets, but it is still difficult to get that time in.

Greg


Sat, 04/05/2008 - 8:15am

jpod00
Posts: 51
 Joined: 2007-11-05
 Dad Points: 59
Thanks for Sharing

Greg,

Thanks for putting this out there. It is really tough to manage your kids, WITHOUT p/t work. Any one who is feeling down because you feel like you can't do it all, read the previous posts again!! No one person can do it all, all the time. How few there are that can recognize and admit it? (Most of the guys here, I suspect)

I don't work outside the house at all, and I need some relief once in a while. If I needed a job, I wouldn't make it. I was about to say I'd be insane, but...

Jim
Boulder, CO
Dad to Cole, Luke & Trev


Mon, 04/07/2008 - 2:18pm

Mr. Dad
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 Dad Points: 81
Thanks RenoDad

I feel very guilty at times that I only stay home with my almost 3 y/o three days a week. Even worse that our one y/o goes to daycare 5 days a week. I work part-time from home, handling some things for my wife's business, and I need to be available for phone calls and misc. items at any given time. There is no way I could get anything done if the one y/o was home with the my older daughter.

The plan is to start keeping my youngest home too, once she reaches 18 months. Hopefully she will be a little more managable by then.

Hearing your situation makes me feel better about my situation. I appreciate your honesty RenoDad, and understand you dilemna as well.

I also commend any Dad or Mom that is able to stay home everyday. It is challenging and exhausting work.


Mon, 04/07/2008 - 6:43pm

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